SfH 17 Kuwabara's a Loner
Author: japancat
Content Rating: T-13
Published: 2012-07-20 00:34:14
Tags: Yu Yu Hakusho, Parody, Humor

Kuwabara becomes depressed that his friends didn't invite him to a party. So depressed he becomes EMO.

Author´s Notes and Disclaimers:
Courtesy to Enoby in My Immortal for the goth speak.
Chapter 17
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Kuwabara practically kicked down the door to the classroom during lunch. He marched right up to Yusuke and Kurama and flipped over their desks.

"The hell is your problem, Kuwbara?" Yusuke growled. "I was about to eat that pineapple onion cake until you showed up!"

"You're gross! You actually eat that?" Kuwbara asked, still fuming.

"Well, actually Shura gave it to Kurama…"

"…And then I gave it to Yusuke," Kurama added.

"Yeah but I think it's nasty so… I was probably gonna take a couple of bites and then spit out those bites and then throw it away anyway."

"So it's not such a bad deal that you threw the desk."

Kuwabara kicked the overturned desks. "And why wasn't I invited! I never get to be there when you do cool stuff! I saw on your facebook that you had the awesomest party ever this weekend and where was I? Sitting at home cleaning my cat's litterbox! Where's Hiei? I want to him hear this too!"

"Uh… I think he's making out with Mukuro right now. You ever see them going at it? It's weird," Yusuke said.

"Have you ever really…?"

"No. People never ask me if I have though. But I saw them go in the broom closet together earlier so they're totally going second base by now… Or maybe third. What's third again?"

"I don't care! I want answers…"

"Uh… Well, that party… Keiko couldn't invite another person because her parents said that she already had too many people invited already…" Yusuke said.

"And I wanted to talk her parents into inviting you but this girl I was going with doesn't like you so she thought we wouldn't really miss you if… But the point is we tried!" Kurama added.

"You should have told me at least instead of making me find out on Shorty's facebook!" Kuwbara kicked the desk again.

"…He has a facebook? And he posts stuff on it?" Kurama looked slightly sad.

"Well, he mostly talked about how he didn't wanna be there which meant that it was a kick ass party! I don't wanna talk to you guys anymore! I'm gonna find myself some new friends! Or be a loner! But I'll get friends that don't ignore me and leave me all alone!"

"But we…"

"Start talking and I'll sing Linkin Park!"

"…Linkin Park's not that bad."

Kuwbara stormed out and walked to the nearest closet to angst. Just when he opened the door, he saw Hiei and Mukuro staring at him. "Oh great! And look who I run into! Mr. I'm too good for my friends so I'll make out with my girlfriend!"

"Uh… We're… we're not dating. We're not doing anything at all right now actually. If you could just move out of the way…" Hiei was interrupted.

"Okay then why didn't you tell me about that party! Why did I have to hear about it on your facebook?"

Mukuro looked at Hiei. "You have a facebook?"

"You don't even have a computer, woman. Why do you wanna know?" He turned back to Kuwabara. "I didn't wanna go but Keiko's mom wanted me to go because I'm her biggest customer. Now seriously, Kuwabara. You need to move."

"And you didn't bother talking her mom into…" He was pushed in and the door slammed behind him. "The crap? What? The door's not opening."

"That's why we've in here together. Somehow Hiei walked into here and someone shut the door on him. Then I walked by and tried to get him out and then the door closed on me. So we're all locked in," Mukuro said. "So until someone else realizes we're in here we'll have to be trapped."

"I don't wanna be in here with you! You guys aren't my friends anymore."

"I was never your friend in the first place."

Hiei grumbled, "And I never liked you to begin with. And the fact that you're stuck with us only makes my anger worse."

The door was opened and there stood the emo of all emos… Kyushi Mitarai. He looked slightly disgusted and grumbled, "Mi emo kloset has ben taken ovr bi sum stupid preps."

As Hiei and Mukuro shoved their way out the closet, Kuwabara had a grand idea… But that involved terrorist plots and dancing like a monkey in the nude, so he had yet another brilliant idea! I'm gonna be EMO! Wait… Im gona b goffic. Fangs to mi frends ho maid mi mak dis relizashun. Geddit cuz im goffic? N no fangs to mi Xfrends. Lolololol

-.-.-Sene chan lolz

"…Was that Enoby just now?" Kurama asked.

"Quit breaking the fourth wall!" Yusuke kicked him.

"The wall is perfectly intact! I was asking an innocent question."


Kurama leaned back in his seat. "You think we should make it up to Kuwabara? He hasn't spoken to us in a week. In fact, I haven't seen him since last time either. I'm starting to get worried."

"What's there to worry about? You know who else we haven't seen much this week? Hiei. You never complain about him not being there."

"Because we know what he's doing. Or we can guess."

"You can't guess what Kuwbara's doing?" Kurama sighed.

Lololololollollolmoar schen changessss

Kuwabara followed Mitarai into the classroom where all the emos hung out at. There he saw the most emo people he ever met- Elder Toguro, Shishiwamumaru, The EMOTIONAL Suzuka, Botan, Sensui, Gourmet, and King Emo himself… Jin! But there was one unexpected face…

"Hiei! Freaking A! What the hell are you doing here?" Kuwbara threw a desk at him. "This is my story and you're not supposed to be part of it!"

"I was dragged here because someone thought I was emo! This is how I end up at the clubs I'm in. How do you think I got into the Student Council?" Hiei growled. "And you stole that line from Kingdom Hearts, you dim bulb!"

"I did not! And everybody knows that you're on Student Council because you're dating the president anyway!"

"I wish I were so I could break up with her."

"Dude that's screwed up."

"Yeah well, the world's an ugly place and this time you can't put a frickin paper bag on it."

And King Emo Jin gagged. "WTF ur datin? …UNACCEPTABLE!"

Hiei saw a way out of this one. "Yeah. We go at in behind the dumpsters and then we send texts to each other when we haven't talked for ten minutes. We worry about each other a lot. In fact, I need to send one now…"

"Stop tat!"

In another part of the school, Mukuro looked at her phone to see a text reading, "lolz I miss u ;)" Either he was paid to do this or he's on something…

Back to our guys… King Emo Jin then kicked Hiei out. And hopefully out of the story. You know after Hiei told him fangs for letin him owt (geddit cuz hes goffix cept now he isn't wich maks him a POSER) Then Jin initiated Kuwbara into their group and then they wrote poetry together. n stuff

Supper sexi transishun

Yusuke and Kurama sat in class, looking between the door and the clock. Yusuke jumped up in his seat when the door opened and was disappointed when it was just Hiei.

"Oh look who finally decides to show up! Just after we needed you the most!" Yusuke threw a spitball at him.

"Yusuke, I think Kuwabara's just gonna skip out until we forgive him so…" Kurama said.

"Bastard better show up. I spent all night baking this stupid cake for him. You know how hard it is to make cakes? This is my third try."

"Really, Yusuke? Really?"

"You don't wanna see him," Hiei said. "And the only reason I was gone was because I kept getting trapped in closets. Trust me on this one."

"The closet or Kuwabara?"

"Yusuke… Really?"

In walked a tall man with hair dyed black with green spikes in it. And then he had this leather jacket with a bunch of zippers on it. Then under that he had an MCR Tshirt (MCR fukin rox n if u don't like dem den ur a prep n perps suk) and then he had tight black jeans. He was also wearing goffic boots n fishnets. After a moment, Yusuke and Kurama realized that it was… Kuwabara!

"O mi Satan loook ho it is its mi prep xfrends. fangs 4 nothin u assholes" And then he sat down gofficly.

"Oh my god… I need to throw up. Someone… Someone call the grammar nazi…" Kurama ran out to the bathroom.

"Kuwbara… You should just take this cake," Yusuke handed it to him.

"Okay!" Kuwabara took it with a smile.

"So you're done being emo, right?"

"wtf? no I just wantd sum cak XP"

"How… How can you say that?"

"Bc ur a prep bich"

"No, I was talking about saying letterface."

"O its esy but im not talking 2 u bc ur a prep" He walked out of class w/ the cake in his hands n he eated it bc hes awsum n goffix

Hiei gave Yusuke some words of comfort: "I give him a week."

A week had passed. Then Kuwabara ran two Yusuke and Kurama during lunch. "I'm tired of being emo or goth or whatever they are! Their speech damages my intelligence."

Hiei stared at him. "You mean with what little you have?"

"Hey, shut up, you! Go make out with Mukuro behind a dumpster like you told the emos you do!"

"Dammit, let that die already!"

Yusuke glanced at Kurama. "You think we should just pretend this never happened?"

He shrugged. "It's too lonely without him. Besides, if he says one more thing in My Immortal speech, I think my head will explode…"

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Chapter 17
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